"Paint" - This is how I feel a lot of days! - Printable Version +- Crimson Daggers — Art forum (//crimsondaggers.com/forum) +-- Forum: PERSONAL ARTWORK (//crimsondaggers.com/forum/forum-9.html) +--- Forum: SEEKING CRITIQUE/PAINTOVERS (//crimsondaggers.com/forum/forum-36.html) +--- Thread: "Paint" - This is how I feel a lot of days! (/thread-2527.html)

"Paint" - This is how I feel a lot of days! - Camilleon - 03-13-2013 I'm back! Have I fine-tuned "The Aerialist" to my satisfaction, you ask? Uh, no. I totally thought re-positioning the text would solve all my problems, but not quite. So, for now, I'm on to other things! What are your thoughts on the following piece? RE: "Paint" - This is how I feel a lot of days! - Myriam - 03-13-2013 I like the painting and I don't see any flaws :D but I would really darken the background of the text because it's hard to read and also I think it would add some oppressive feel to the piece. =) RE: "Paint" - This is how I feel a lot of days! - JabyReART - 03-13-2013 Hi Camilleon, good piece!, I see some problems with the right leg, its a little too big, and given the background I will push the saturation and the contrast a little bit more, and after that I will highlight the back side...I did a paintover to show you all these, hope it will help! keep drawing! RE: "Paint" - This is how I feel a lot of days! - Amit Dutta - 03-14-2013 Heya again :) I dig the idea. In terms of crit how about using an almost black vignetted BG instead and have the light source be the paint instead of external so she would be underlit with all sorts of awesome colours? I really like the idea of her hair not just being coloured, but maybe morphing into paint and oozing down her and dripping onto the puddle? In terms of the text, I think it would benefit from some grammar checking and an external eye on it. I have script edited for published stuff before and I can see that some of it needs a bit of work. As your compositions include text, you should be just as thorough with the wordsmithing as the art. Maybe get someone to proofread it and offer suggestions? Hope that helps RE: "Paint" - This is how I feel a lot of days! - Camilleon - 03-22-2013 Thanks so much, everyone! And sorry for the delay--got sidetracked with a lot of different things, unfortunately. Myriam, you're absolutely correct--I darkened up the background. How is it now? JabyReART, you're right--there were some issues with the underlying drawing, but it actually wasn't the leg. When I superimposed the reference image, I discovered that I had drawn the torso and the arms a bit off. I've fixed them both--do you think the leg looks better now? Monkeybread, I love your suggestion, but at this point, I'm not sure I'm willing to invest the time it would take to make those changes--altering the light source would be a very time-consuming challenge for me. For now, I'd just like to move on, but it's not inconceivable I won't revisit this in the future...that's the advantage of a digital format! As for the text, I'll be getting a critique from the creative writing group I go to shortly, so hopefully they'll be able to give me some useful feedback! Thank you again, all of you!!! RE: "Paint" - This is how I feel a lot of days! - Myriam - 03-22-2013 the legibility has improved a lot! But I guess I would darken it even more, go nearly black so she looks like she's sitting in this oppressive pit. I did a really quick paintover, just using the burn tool and neglecting the text so you get a sense of what I'm talking about. You could go even darker, I guess. See for yourself if you like it or not =) RE: "Paint" - This is how I feel a lot of days! - Camilleon - 03-28-2013 Thanks, Myriam! I like how this feels more oppressive, but I'm a little sad that the green color is mostly lost. Maybe I'll run both versions by my creative writing group and see what they think!