07-12-2016, 01:01 PM
@Amit: You are the best Amit :) I now know what you mean. I've learned a lot on this trip, not only about myself, but about the people I hang around with too. Also, thanks so much for mentioning Jeso; I didn't check in on here until now, but I'd love to talk to him about his choice! I'm right near Osaka, so I know what he's experiencing, weather-wise, at least, haha!
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Update: Coming to Japan and talking to my friends who teach here, I've decided; I really want to pursue my artwork more than anything else. I think that epiphany came when I visited the Manga museum in Kyoto, and saw the hands (They're cast in plaster!!) and the art of some of the people I've admired since I was a wee thing.
So on the heels of that decision, it looks like I need to restructure my life so that I can pursue my art, at least for now.
I could move back in with my parents, and get a low-stress job to help them out (as well as to pay off my various debts...). With the time saved from driving, I can focus more on Mirage and my other personal projects. If I go down to part time, I might even be able to volunteer to help animators and try to network, building up some animation experience while I complete the comic.
The thought of all that makes me so happy, and takes a huge weight off my shoulders. But I'm always told to get out of my comfort zone... is pursuing the things that takes the weight off the shoulders considered the comfort zone? I mean, I'll be leaving a decently paying job for a lesser one... but... I'll get more time to draw...
I'm really feeling kinda lost in all this... Please feel free to tell me I'm being an idiot. I don't know what I'm doing. My friends, who were artsy when we were younger, have all started to move on, and most of them are in education. They're all telling me to move on from my parents, but with them, I'll have the space to do what I love.
I'm really worried that I've screwed up royally. I find that I'm unhappy and frustrated with what I have now; my job, the little free time I have, my artistic progress.... And I think that's part of why I'm just so low. I feel like I've failed. I know I'm still young and have all sorts of twists and turns left, and that gives me hope, but I feel so far behind, like I've taken a wrong turn, and there's such a huge mountain ahead.
Gah, I just feel so lost.
In more upbeat news, I have been trucking along with my goals for Mirage, despite all that:
Thank you for reading, if you are still keeping up with my drivil!
-------
Update: Coming to Japan and talking to my friends who teach here, I've decided; I really want to pursue my artwork more than anything else. I think that epiphany came when I visited the Manga museum in Kyoto, and saw the hands (They're cast in plaster!!) and the art of some of the people I've admired since I was a wee thing.
So on the heels of that decision, it looks like I need to restructure my life so that I can pursue my art, at least for now.
I could move back in with my parents, and get a low-stress job to help them out (as well as to pay off my various debts...). With the time saved from driving, I can focus more on Mirage and my other personal projects. If I go down to part time, I might even be able to volunteer to help animators and try to network, building up some animation experience while I complete the comic.
The thought of all that makes me so happy, and takes a huge weight off my shoulders. But I'm always told to get out of my comfort zone... is pursuing the things that takes the weight off the shoulders considered the comfort zone? I mean, I'll be leaving a decently paying job for a lesser one... but... I'll get more time to draw...
I'm really feeling kinda lost in all this... Please feel free to tell me I'm being an idiot. I don't know what I'm doing. My friends, who were artsy when we were younger, have all started to move on, and most of them are in education. They're all telling me to move on from my parents, but with them, I'll have the space to do what I love.
I'm really worried that I've screwed up royally. I find that I'm unhappy and frustrated with what I have now; my job, the little free time I have, my artistic progress.... And I think that's part of why I'm just so low. I feel like I've failed. I know I'm still young and have all sorts of twists and turns left, and that gives me hope, but I feel so far behind, like I've taken a wrong turn, and there's such a huge mountain ahead.
Gah, I just feel so lost.
In more upbeat news, I have been trucking along with my goals for Mirage, despite all that:
- The manuscript has been critiqued and commented on by a writing group, some writing friends, and also from some wonderful folks in the Tapastic forums.
- I'm working on the final rewrite of the story, and will have it done by August 1st. Drawing commences August 2nd. Still on track for this, as well as submitting to Iron Circus Comics and the Creators for Creators grant in November (If I find that I love doing the comic).
- Finishing up my animation goals. I started one here in Japan, and another is to be completed when I get home. Soon!
Thank you for reading, if you are still keeping up with my drivil!