Can't figure out how to improve

[John]

I cant figure out how to improve. Over the past 12 years I've wanted to be a concept artist/illustrator/painter. It was my mission for about 6 years, but my progress really discouraged me to a point where I gave up for about 4 years.
I have alot of good books, tutorials, videos. What I lack is a real ability to problem solve.
Sometimes I think I'm autistic or maybe I just have add.
I know alot of painting/drawing "facts" and "info". But I cant apply them. Or fix a problem.

I want to try again. I dont expect to be a pro overnight. I just want to see legit consistent progress.

I can't seem to learn from my mistakes. And I have no original ideas.

Its so hard for me to give up on this dream but I have to get better or let it go. I enjoy doing it. But I just don't want to take it seriously if I can't get somewhere real with my ability.

I had that mental thing too where I wanted to be a concept artist/illustrator/painter. I still do. I realize my own bullshit whenever I catch myself loving the idea of being one rather than doing the actual work itself.

Always wanted to be a concept artist but never really designed anything. Not even trying to attempt to do it because of that voice telling me it's never going to be professionally good enough anyway. So why bother.

The way I get over it is to remind myself really why I wanted to become one. It's to make cool shit. I don't think these concept artists' financial ability were the main thing that drew you into this world of creating art. Don't get me wrong, making it to the pros it's a nice goal to have. I think the difference between people who make it professionally and those who don't is how you'd answer this question: how much do you love the craft? Would you still concept design/illustrate/paint if money wasn't involved?

I don't think I need to tell you what do to. You claim you are well read. There's a lot of good advice from members here that you can run with. I really think it's the idea of failing that's getting to you. You will fail. You will sometimes feel like you're getting stagnant. Improve through your failures. Can't see your failures? Post your art publicly and we'll do the criticism for you.

Less talk and do more art shit!