08-10-2014, 10:13 PM
Hey monkeybread, thanks for the very thoughtful response.
Wow, you touched on things I hadn't even thought of but are totally true!!!!!!!! I guess I have been reading too many negative articles online, and also, to be honest, in the past I had a long-term relationship with someone who was an artist who was really good and made me feel like absolute shit about my abilities. That really left a huge mark in my psyche to be honest. (I was also having a lot of family problems at the time too... I was homeless for a bit due to said family problems and as a result developed an anxiety disorder. I'm working on trying to get better now but it's been a long process to deal with anxiety and fear in all aspects of my life, not just with art).
I love art but now I am so stressed out about this idea of "changing careers" that I can almost not even draw, the anxiety to do something "correctly" is so big! But back when I was in high school, I was quite skilled at art and didn't have that fear. As such, I drew a lot.
I am going to read your post carefully and think about what you said. You are spot on that my response comes from fear of a negative future. I really appreciate your feedback on the subject, and your wisdom as someone who is older and has gone through it yourself!!!
Wow, you touched on things I hadn't even thought of but are totally true!!!!!!!! I guess I have been reading too many negative articles online, and also, to be honest, in the past I had a long-term relationship with someone who was an artist who was really good and made me feel like absolute shit about my abilities. That really left a huge mark in my psyche to be honest. (I was also having a lot of family problems at the time too... I was homeless for a bit due to said family problems and as a result developed an anxiety disorder. I'm working on trying to get better now but it's been a long process to deal with anxiety and fear in all aspects of my life, not just with art).
I love art but now I am so stressed out about this idea of "changing careers" that I can almost not even draw, the anxiety to do something "correctly" is so big! But back when I was in high school, I was quite skilled at art and didn't have that fear. As such, I drew a lot.
I am going to read your post carefully and think about what you said. You are spot on that my response comes from fear of a negative future. I really appreciate your feedback on the subject, and your wisdom as someone who is older and has gone through it yourself!!!