Walent's sketchbook

[Fedodika]

Hmm, Into the Void is a very intense film lol. You're looking for that nihilistic, painful, dragged out sensation lol? Maybe you got something different out of it than i did lol, but it did get me interested in one day trying DMT and meet the aliens. But the film is a pure work of art, because the director really believed in something and he felt something very hardened by passion and time.

You seem really burnt out my man, and instead of telling you to draw this or that or whatever, just try existing for a while. Just be there. Be present you know? Ekhart Tolle talks about it a lot of just feeling the pleasure of existing and being aware of breathing and the bones and muscle in your body.

I think you'd benefit from some sort of social interaction as well. I mean, even if its just regular people or people you barely know. It can be tough if you're introverted and i pick up a lot of that from you after hearing your voice and reading your thoughts. But from my personal experience, doing caricature in town once a week and forcing myself in this situation where anything can happen has really made me know exactly what i want in life.

You could also try well, finding a cause you care about (that isn't art.) It could be political, it could be religious, or philosophical. Maybe you want justice for a group of people, maybe you want to prove a god does or doesnt exist, maybe you want to set all the animals in the cages free. What do you really care about? And if you don't have anything to you than art, what good are you as an artist?

You know, surely you believe in some thing and that thing would be something you could argue for with some one person to convince them. Have you ever spent time debating someone for something you passionately believe? Doing that for years really REALLY helped me know what i want in life and what i want to achieve. Its a HUGE time sink, debating people online, but man you end up researching and learning about the thing you're debating out of passion. Because you WANT to be right. And if you're a logical guy, that can really pull at your heart strings.

I'm not successful at art at all, but when i do; I feel i will never run out of motivation because success has been kept from me for so insanely long, I'll infinitely cherish it when i get it. And all that time of not being successful made me look to things i was passionate about in the meantime for little victories while i toiled away in futility to develop as an artist as hard as i could.

There's a WHOLE WORLD outside your chair. There's a whole set of senses outside of vision. There's an infite number of things you could dabble in or master that are not art. See value in them even if it seems unattractive at first