04-12-2013, 12:34 PM
Sure the desert can be an antagonist. Most road stories have an abstract antagonist. In fear and loathing the villain was "the establishment". Same goes for Good Fellas.
My beat sheet is in the middle of revisions. Kind of a hot mess at the moment. I'm pretty confident in my 10 page script. I'll go ahead and paste it in.
Page 1 ext. oil field, day
Panel 1 We see a large sepia landscape of an oil field
with hundreds of pumps and a solitary blue helmeted peace
keeper. His name is Beaufous.
BEAUFOUS
Deer Mother. I am your son
Beaufous. The nice men in blue hats
has put me on a oil pumping farm.
Panel 2 A closer view hones in on Beaufous writing a
letter.
BEAUFOUS
We has to stop bad men from burning
the oil farm on fire.
Panel 3 The letter flies into the wind.
Panel 4 Beaufous chases after it.
Page 2
Panel 1 A giant black dust storm rolls in behind him as
he obliviously grabs his letter.
Panel 2 Beau is pulled away by a fellow peacekeeper in a
powder blue gas mask.
Panel 3 The black dust blows them into the bunker.
Page 3 int. bunker
Panel 1 We get an establishing of the Bunker. There are
maps, terminals, phones and fax machines everywhere.
Everything is in a blue color gamut
Panel 2 The soldier lifts up his blue mask. His name is
Unfu. He's a lanky African with a pitch black skin tone.
UNFU
What were you doing out there? You
Americans are so ignorant. Not even
sure why we risk our lives to
protect your lot.
Panel 3
BEAUFOUS
Why are you mean at me, Unfu? I am
nice to you because we are friends.
Panel 4
UNFU
I'm only upset with you because I
am your friend and I don't want to
see you hurt yourself.
Panel 5 A giant boot comes crashing into Unfu's face.
Page 4
Panel 1 Two "Gold Tooth" mercenaries start pushing Unfu
around.
GOLD TOOTH 1
Yeah Unfu "why you so mean at him?"
GOLD TOOTH 2
"We only mean at you because we
friends."
Panel 2 Beau stands up to the Gold Teeth as they take
turns beating Unfu.
BEAUFOUS
You leave Unfu alone.
GOLD TOOTH 1
We would if he would have left you
alone in that hell storm.
GOLD TOOTH 2
We like seeing trash blow in the
wind.
Panel 3 Beau pulls out his powder blue side arm.
GOLD TOOTH 1
That's a nice toy you have there
son.
GOLD TOOTH 2
Go ahead and squeeze the trigger.
UNFU
Don't!
Panel 4 Beau pulls the trigger against the gold tooth's
head. Only resulting in a click.
Page 5
Panel 1 The Gold Tooth pats Beau on the back.
BEAUFOUS
It must be broken.
GOLD TOOTH 1
Don't worry I'll fix it for ya.
Panel 2 Unfu is helpless in the grip of a headlock while
the Gold Tooth loads the gun.
UNFU
Please don't!
GOLD TOOTH 1
Every toy needs batteries.
Panel 3 The Gold Teeth execute Unfu while Beau helplessly
watches.
Page 6
Panel 1 A high ranking commander (Iman) steps in and
shitkicks the gold teeth.
Panel 2 Iman berates the gold teeth with a boot on ones
throat and the other in a headlock with the gun pointed at
his temple.
IMAN
You two have been nothing but
trouble since we took your
contract.
GOLD TOOTH 1
Squeeze the trigger if you want to
see what happens when you violate a
guild contract.
GOLD TOOTH 2
Only three more weeks left on the
contract.
Panel 3 Iman lets them go.
IMAN
I should make you write an apology
letter to that boy's family in
Somalia.
GOLD TOOTH 1
you should tell them it was
insurgents.
GOLD TOOTH 2
Like the last time you wanted us to
write an apology.
Panel 4 Iman pulls Beau by the ear.
IMAN
Your people just don't have any
common sense....Get up top and wash
their car.
BEAUFOUS
But they hurt my best friend in the
head. I don't want to do nice
things for them.
Panel 5 Iman shoves Beau out the door
IMAN
Sorry, it's written in their
contract. After every dust storm we
are obligated to wash their
vehicle.
Page 7 EXT. OIL FIELD, DAY
Panel 1 Beau takes a dump in the gunner seat of the Gold
Teeth's combat vehicle while writing a letter.
BEAUFOUS
Deer mother. Today was a bad day.
The mean men with Gold Teeth are
making me so mad I want to hurt
them. If I do the nice men in blue
will be too mad at me. So I will
has to leave them. I like helping
them because they were nice to us
when every day was a bad day. But
they make me help the mean men with
gold teeth and they like making
everybody has a bad day. They are
more mean than the mean men in
black that burned down our farm.
Page 8
Panel 1 The Gold Teeth come out of the bunker. Beau pulls
up his pants.
Panel 2 Beau points the gun at them. But Beau is the
least of their concerns.
GOLD TOOTH 1
'You see that? Way off in the
distance.
GOLD TOOTH 2
I think it's a bloody Thrasher.
Panel 3 The gold teeth open fire into the vague distance.
Panel 4 A Thrasher with a sledge hammer attacks them from
behind.
Panel 5 Beau opens fire.
Page 9
Panel 1 The grenade rounds bounce off of them.
Panel 2 The thrasher yells at Beau.
THRASHER
grenade rounds don't work on soft
targets, dumb ass.
BEAUFOUS
Thank you.
Panel 3 Beau starts shooting at the bunker.
Panel 4 The grenade rounds do the job all too well.
Panel 5 The bunker collapses.
Page 10
Panel 1 Beau is pulled into the combat vehicle.
Panel 2 When he struggles to get out, he fires the gun
uncontrollably.
Panel 3 A chain reaction of oil pumps explode as Beau is
pulled in.
Panel 4 An epic dark dust storm engulfs the firey
hellscape in the oilfield.
My beat sheet is in the middle of revisions. Kind of a hot mess at the moment. I'm pretty confident in my 10 page script. I'll go ahead and paste it in.
Page 1 ext. oil field, day
Panel 1 We see a large sepia landscape of an oil field
with hundreds of pumps and a solitary blue helmeted peace
keeper. His name is Beaufous.
BEAUFOUS
Deer Mother. I am your son
Beaufous. The nice men in blue hats
has put me on a oil pumping farm.
Panel 2 A closer view hones in on Beaufous writing a
letter.
BEAUFOUS
We has to stop bad men from burning
the oil farm on fire.
Panel 3 The letter flies into the wind.
Panel 4 Beaufous chases after it.
Page 2
Panel 1 A giant black dust storm rolls in behind him as
he obliviously grabs his letter.
Panel 2 Beau is pulled away by a fellow peacekeeper in a
powder blue gas mask.
Panel 3 The black dust blows them into the bunker.
Page 3 int. bunker
Panel 1 We get an establishing of the Bunker. There are
maps, terminals, phones and fax machines everywhere.
Everything is in a blue color gamut
Panel 2 The soldier lifts up his blue mask. His name is
Unfu. He's a lanky African with a pitch black skin tone.
UNFU
What were you doing out there? You
Americans are so ignorant. Not even
sure why we risk our lives to
protect your lot.
Panel 3
BEAUFOUS
Why are you mean at me, Unfu? I am
nice to you because we are friends.
Panel 4
UNFU
I'm only upset with you because I
am your friend and I don't want to
see you hurt yourself.
Panel 5 A giant boot comes crashing into Unfu's face.
Page 4
Panel 1 Two "Gold Tooth" mercenaries start pushing Unfu
around.
GOLD TOOTH 1
Yeah Unfu "why you so mean at him?"
GOLD TOOTH 2
"We only mean at you because we
friends."
Panel 2 Beau stands up to the Gold Teeth as they take
turns beating Unfu.
BEAUFOUS
You leave Unfu alone.
GOLD TOOTH 1
We would if he would have left you
alone in that hell storm.
GOLD TOOTH 2
We like seeing trash blow in the
wind.
Panel 3 Beau pulls out his powder blue side arm.
GOLD TOOTH 1
That's a nice toy you have there
son.
GOLD TOOTH 2
Go ahead and squeeze the trigger.
UNFU
Don't!
Panel 4 Beau pulls the trigger against the gold tooth's
head. Only resulting in a click.
Page 5
Panel 1 The Gold Tooth pats Beau on the back.
BEAUFOUS
It must be broken.
GOLD TOOTH 1
Don't worry I'll fix it for ya.
Panel 2 Unfu is helpless in the grip of a headlock while
the Gold Tooth loads the gun.
UNFU
Please don't!
GOLD TOOTH 1
Every toy needs batteries.
Panel 3 The Gold Teeth execute Unfu while Beau helplessly
watches.
Page 6
Panel 1 A high ranking commander (Iman) steps in and
shitkicks the gold teeth.
Panel 2 Iman berates the gold teeth with a boot on ones
throat and the other in a headlock with the gun pointed at
his temple.
IMAN
You two have been nothing but
trouble since we took your
contract.
GOLD TOOTH 1
Squeeze the trigger if you want to
see what happens when you violate a
guild contract.
GOLD TOOTH 2
Only three more weeks left on the
contract.
Panel 3 Iman lets them go.
IMAN
I should make you write an apology
letter to that boy's family in
Somalia.
GOLD TOOTH 1
you should tell them it was
insurgents.
GOLD TOOTH 2
Like the last time you wanted us to
write an apology.
Panel 4 Iman pulls Beau by the ear.
IMAN
Your people just don't have any
common sense....Get up top and wash
their car.
BEAUFOUS
But they hurt my best friend in the
head. I don't want to do nice
things for them.
Panel 5 Iman shoves Beau out the door
IMAN
Sorry, it's written in their
contract. After every dust storm we
are obligated to wash their
vehicle.
Page 7 EXT. OIL FIELD, DAY
Panel 1 Beau takes a dump in the gunner seat of the Gold
Teeth's combat vehicle while writing a letter.
BEAUFOUS
Deer mother. Today was a bad day.
The mean men with Gold Teeth are
making me so mad I want to hurt
them. If I do the nice men in blue
will be too mad at me. So I will
has to leave them. I like helping
them because they were nice to us
when every day was a bad day. But
they make me help the mean men with
gold teeth and they like making
everybody has a bad day. They are
more mean than the mean men in
black that burned down our farm.
Page 8
Panel 1 The Gold Teeth come out of the bunker. Beau pulls
up his pants.
Panel 2 Beau points the gun at them. But Beau is the
least of their concerns.
GOLD TOOTH 1
'You see that? Way off in the
distance.
GOLD TOOTH 2
I think it's a bloody Thrasher.
Panel 3 The gold teeth open fire into the vague distance.
Panel 4 A Thrasher with a sledge hammer attacks them from
behind.
Panel 5 Beau opens fire.
Page 9
Panel 1 The grenade rounds bounce off of them.
Panel 2 The thrasher yells at Beau.
THRASHER
grenade rounds don't work on soft
targets, dumb ass.
BEAUFOUS
Thank you.
Panel 3 Beau starts shooting at the bunker.
Panel 4 The grenade rounds do the job all too well.
Panel 5 The bunker collapses.
Page 10
Panel 1 Beau is pulled into the combat vehicle.
Panel 2 When he struggles to get out, he fires the gun
uncontrollably.
Panel 3 A chain reaction of oil pumps explode as Beau is
pulled in.
Panel 4 An epic dark dust storm engulfs the firey
hellscape in the oilfield.