06-14-2016, 03:36 AM
Hahaha! Bun Stuffers! that's great! I think the narrative reads pretty well. I think the compositions of the top 5 panels are working well, But i'm not sure if the bottom ones are. maybe try out some different comps for the lower half of the page. I feel like they are not flowing as well as the top half. I'm also not 100% sure on how to read the last two panels, what order do you read them? i'm wanting to read to the right of the 6th panel because you have a horizon line on the 6th, which leads me to the right. But i'm not sure if i'm supposed to read it that way, because the wiener seems to be suggested as a final panel. My advise would be to figure out some cool compositions that have a nice flow and that also read well. But overall really cool idea imo. looking forward to seeing it develop!