Monster Hunter Fan Art . Need critique. (First Time posting)
#1
Shocked 
I worked on this as much as I can till I had no idea what more I can do. I fee it could use some more stuff, friend of mine said tighten up the arms and hands and your good. I want to know what you guys think.

I also...don't quite know how to go about the "detailing" process since it's been pointed out that my stuff tends to be in the "rough" and I want to know if I got the detailing part right in this piece.




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#2
WHY i would say i see it as rough is the fact that the light is only ''mapped'' this mean that you know where you want have light and shadow but is not clearly giving volume to the some of the shape.

serie about foundation of light and shadow
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0q-LZVFZu...WqScFTRhtv

shading round object
http://psd.tutsplus.com/tutorials/drawin...photoshop/
light and shadow
http://psd.tutsplus.com/tutorials/drawin...photoshop/

this should only be a guide. You need to pratice volume and observation and there is also being able to choose where to put a lightsource to have the best effect on the character you want to showcase. It recommended to have two light source to show volume. Cleaning edge is also a other important part to stay out of a rough look and to blend correctly you need to have the right type of blending depending on the texture of the surface


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#3
Another reason for the rough-look might be the gaps between the shapes of color and outlines. The blue paint may be lighting, but it also looks like the backgrounds showing through where you didn't paint in. I'm not sure if this is true or if this is just personal preference speaking, but for outlines to work well, it either goes the route of Mucha (clear and distinct in roping in shapes of color), gets covered by paint, or becomes part of the shapes of color.

No outline:



Assimilated outline:



Distinct outline:





Focus.
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#4
(12-13-2013, 03:08 AM)meat Wrote: Another reason for the rough-look might be the gaps between the shapes of color and outlines. The blue paint may be lighting, but it also looks like the backgrounds showing through where you didn't paint in. I'm not sure if this is true or if this is just personal preference speaking, but for outlines to work well, it either goes the route of Mucha (clear and distinct in roping in shapes of color), gets covered by paint, or becomes part of the shapes of color.

No outline:


Assimilated outline:


Distinct outline:

sorry to interrupt not sure if it needed but wanna ask if those image are your if not maybe it need to give credit to the artist

My Sketchbook
The journey of an artist truly begin when he can learn from everyone error.
Teamwork make your dream work.
Asking help is the key to growth.
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#5
Your anatomy is broken, the head is too small. Your blue sky would affect his clothing, he has a copy and pasted look because of that.

Meat is correct about your outline, it needs one or none, right now it looks unfinished.

Is the big white circle a light source? If so the lighting it not matching it, put an action figure on a table and shine a flashlight towards it and into your eyes, it would cause a heavy shadow and obscure the figure.

Another issue is that you are dipping into your dark values too much. Do a study with a figure and a flashlight.

Livestream Crits/Paintovers: www.twitch.tv/mike086
Loomis Study videos: http://www.youtube.com/user/mike086


My Facebook page: MCIII
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#6
(12-13-2013, 05:39 AM)darktiste Wrote:
(12-13-2013, 03:08 AM)meat Wrote: Another reason for the rough-look might be the gaps between the shapes of color and outlines. The blue paint may be lighting, but it also looks like the backgrounds showing through where you didn't paint in. I'm not sure if this is true or if this is just personal preference speaking, but for outlines to work well, it either goes the route of Mucha (clear and distinct in roping in shapes of color), gets covered by paint, or becomes part of the shapes of color.

No outline:


Assimilated outline:


Distinct outline:

sorry to interrupt not sure if it needed but wanna ask if those image are your if not maybe it need to give credit to the artist

Didn't think of that. I don't know who made them, found them on Google Image. If that's inappropriate the mods can delete them.


Focus.
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#7
(12-13-2013, 03:00 PM)Mike086 Wrote: Your anatomy is broken, the head is too small. Your blue sky would affect his clothing, he has a copy and pasted look because of that.

Meat is correct about your outline, it needs one or none, right now it looks unfinished.

Is the big white circle a light source? If so the lighting it not matching it, put an action figure on a table and shine a flashlight towards it and into your eyes, it would cause a heavy shadow and obscure the figure.

Another issue is that you are dipping into your dark values too much. Do a study with a figure and a flashlight.

Hello just want to share my opinion about your comment i think you sound to ''me'' a bit to aggressive like he as no choose but to follow your instruction i would recommend you to say you can instead of do a study because to ''me''it was to imperative .It would sound better in my opinion.Also saying that is anatomy is broken was for ''me'' not acceptable

My Sketchbook
The journey of an artist truly begin when he can learn from everyone error.
Teamwork make your dream work.
Asking help is the key to growth.
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#8
(12-14-2013, 09:12 AM)darktiste Wrote:
(12-13-2013, 03:00 PM)Mike086 Wrote: Your anatomy is broken, the head is too small. Your blue sky would affect his clothing, he has a copy and pasted look because of that.

Meat is correct about your outline, it needs one or none, right now it looks unfinished.

Is the big white circle a light source? If so the lighting it not matching it, put an action figure on a table and shine a flashlight towards it and into your eyes, it would cause a heavy shadow and obscure the figure.

Another issue is that you are dipping into your dark values too much. Do a study with a figure and a flashlight.

Hello just want to share my opinion about your comment i think you sound to ''me'' a bit to aggressive like he as no choose but to follow your instruction i would recommend you to say you can instead of do a study because to ''me''it was to imperative .It would sound better in my opinion.Also saying that is anatomy is broken was for ''me'' not acceptable

Sorry! My tone is way off in text format.

Livestream Crits/Paintovers: www.twitch.tv/mike086
Loomis Study videos: http://www.youtube.com/user/mike086


My Facebook page: MCIII
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#9
Wait, I thought the Crimson Daggers is supposed to be known for blunt and aggressive crits? Otherwise, what's the difference between here and other art forums like conceptart and deviantart?


Focus.
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#10
(12-14-2013, 10:48 AM)Mike086 Wrote:
(12-14-2013, 09:12 AM)darktiste Wrote:
(12-13-2013, 03:00 PM)Mike086 Wrote: Your anatomy is broken, the head is too small. Your blue sky would affect his clothing, he has a copy and pasted look because of that.

Meat is correct about your outline, it needs one or none, right now it looks unfinished.

Is the big white circle a light source? If so the lighting it not matching it, put an action figure on a table and shine a flashlight towards it and into your eyes, it would cause a heavy shadow and obscure the figure.

Another issue is that you are dipping into your dark values too much. Do a study with a figure and a flashlight.

Hello just want to share my opinion about your comment i think you sound to ''me'' a bit to aggressive like he as no choose but to follow your instruction i would recommend you to say you can instead of do a study because to ''me''it was to imperative .It would sound better in my opinion.Also saying that is anatomy is broken was for ''me'' not acceptable

Sorry! My tone is way off in text format.


We can be harsh in a polite way and a contructive way.I was under the impression that you choose world that didnt give him the choose to but to follow your instruction.
That was is first time being critized maybe he did take it well but we need to be careful we dont want to scare away people who may seek help.
Sorry that was my point.

My Sketchbook
The journey of an artist truly begin when he can learn from everyone error.
Teamwork make your dream work.
Asking help is the key to growth.
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#11
Well, for the record, I hate "harsh" critiques, constructive criticism is the term I prefer and there is always a way to say something nice and not be harsh. My tone was a victim to the text, had you heard my inflections and voice actually say the same words I would have sounded very chill and calm.

Livestream Crits/Paintovers: www.twitch.tv/mike086
Loomis Study videos: http://www.youtube.com/user/mike086


My Facebook page: MCIII
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#12
Yo dude, sorry about this non-related conversation that started to take over your thread. I did a live stream for you though so you can here what I was talking about.

http://livestre.am/4IdDP
Watch it at the link above.

[Image: stichmouth.jpg]

Livestream Crits/Paintovers: www.twitch.tv/mike086
Loomis Study videos: http://www.youtube.com/user/mike086


My Facebook page: MCIII
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#13
Don't worry it's fine. If anything I should not use acronyms when introducing my work. This piece is based off of the video game series Monster Hunter. Mike I saw watched you do the paintover for which I thank you :D. I took some of your suggestion like the added lightsource that would aid in the showing of the character.

Dragons(among other monsters) are kinda common place in this universe and the armor is made of literally anything the characters can get their hands on. I selected that armor specifically due to the recognizability of in universe.

What I was going for was to make a hunter that was set in this universe. I wanted him to be some badass that "isn't afraid of anything". The kind of guy ho could go strolling through an area that had dragons.



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#14
Heya, just some quick bullet points, because I don't have time. This tends to come off as rude, so I'm not trying to be.

- The composition really isn't working. It is too centred with the head in the middle, the character cut off at the knees, lots of empty space in top half. Suggest referencing card art for good comps.
- The anatomy is still broken, torso at strange angle to hips, waist too high, arms not in proportion, no neck.
- You are clearly scared of losing your rendering. Don't be. You'll learn more if you get it right by building your fundamentals properly.

I'm going to suggest the hard message of starting from scratch and drawing the figure properly in proportion and perspective. Fix the comp at the same time. Don't move on to rendering until the figure is right. Do lots of thumbnails. Post them in here or as a new crit post so you can get feedback at that stage. You aren't quite ready to get crit on rendering only. Fundamentals are where it's at.
Hope that helps.

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