foreshortening crit
#1
There were a few things I was trying to accomplish with this piece.
First, foreshortening; I'm not 100% sure I accomplished that, It still looks like the hand and the guy are at the same distance. I don't know if its the color or detail.
Second, narrative. I was trying for creepy... like he's trying to grab you, but it just looks like a guy reaching out to me.
Third, composition. I do think an environment would help the composition as well as the narrative, but I have yet to think of a scene to place him in.

Help please.

[Image: robo_reach3.jpg]
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#2
I he is supposed to grab you, I would put the hand a little more to the left, and open it up, so that you can see the palm of his hand. I guess you could also make it a little bigger.

then the hand needs the highest contrast - I see you already started doing this, but you can push it even more. also, maybe put more red tones into the hand?

for a scene, how about a weird angle that implies you are looking up to the guy, maybe with some urban city in the background? Then you could tilt the skyscrapers so, that they point to the guys head.

another thing: I would make the armor at the bottom of the picture even darker, and les saturated. if the focal point is the hand, you are maybe still perceiving the head, but his belly is not really that important. maybe you could make a hard lighting from a spotlight from above - highly illuminating the hand and head, but leaving the rest in darkness.

:) can't do a paintover, I do not have a tablet atm, but hope this helped :) (and you understood my weird english... -_-)

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#3
Hey zae1X,

i really like the idea of the dude grabbing the viewer, as it is really an intense comp.
I did a little step by step of my overpaint. sorry there was not much time but i hope it helps nonetheless.

1. when looking at the structure of the body you see that both arms go towards the viewer and his body is not really twisted much. try to do his pose and you'll see, that for grabbing the pose can really be more pushed.
[Image: we2jV.jpg]

2. that's what i did, i changed the canvassize so his arm is not cut off. something you should generally avoid, as it seems as if you are avoiding to draw the cut off subject. the hand in the foreground is hovering as it has no arm attached to it in your picture. the viewer has to be able to somehow link the hand and the body together, and the arm is something that is there to do that. also i added the second hand far in the background and turned his chest.
[Image: uPVNQ.jpg]

3. just a rough block in, but you get the idea. also added some texture on the face and some menacing red glow and a breathcloud. to me the idea that it is cold but he is wearing only his iron gear makes him somewhat badass and insane. also added a weapon that he is swinging to give the picture some more impending danger.
[Image: 4qPxJ.jpg]

if i had more time, i would probably change the light as right now it is kinda standard. it would be creepier if it came from below.

hope that helped.

cheers,
Flo


Please help me getting better by checking out my sketchbook

HOMEPAGE http://floart.weebly.com
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#4
(07-16-2012, 05:50 PM)Saraiza Wrote: I he is supposed to grab you, I would put the hand a little more to the left, and open it up, so that you can see the palm of his hand. I guess you could also make it a little bigger.

then the hand needs the highest contrast - I see you already started doing this, but you can push it even more. also, maybe put more red tones into the hand?

for a scene, how about a weird angle that implies you are looking up to the guy, maybe with some urban city in the background? Then you could tilt the skyscrapers so, that they point to the guys head.

another thing: I would make the armor at the bottom of the picture even darker, and les saturated. if the focal point is the hand, you are maybe still perceiving the head, but his belly is not really that important. maybe you could make a hard lighting from a spotlight from above - highly illuminating the hand and head, but leaving the rest in darkness.

:) can't do a paintover, I do not have a tablet atm, but hope this helped :) (and you understood my weird english... -_-)

Thank you for your help. I love the idea that the viewer is looking up at him rather than straight ahead... it implies more helplessness in the viewer. no need for a paintover, the detail helped immensely. Thanks again.

(07-16-2012, 06:12 PM)Flo Wrote: Hey zae1X,

i really like the idea of the dude grabbing the viewer, as it is really an intense comp.
I did a little step by step of my overpaint. sorry there was not much time but i hope it helps nonetheless.

1. when looking at the structure of the body you see that both arms go towards the viewer and his body is not really twisted much. try to do his pose and you'll see, that for grabbing the pose can really be more pushed.
[Image: we2jV.jpg]

2. that's what i did, i changed the canvassize so his arm is not cut off. something you should generally avoid, as it seems as if you are avoiding to draw the cut off subject. the hand in the foreground is hovering as it has no arm attached to it in your picture. the viewer has to be able to somehow link the hand and the body together, and the arm is something that is there to do that. also i added the second hand far in the background and turned his chest.
[Image: uPVNQ.jpg]

3. just a rough block in, but you get the idea. also added some texture on the face and some menacing red glow and a breathcloud. to me the idea that it is cold but he is wearing only his iron gear makes him somewhat badass and insane. also added a weapon that he is swinging to give the picture some more impending danger.
[Image: 4qPxJ.jpg]

if i had more time, i would probably change the light as right now it is kinda standard. it would be creepier if it came from below.

hope that helped.

cheers,
Flo

This looks way more dramatic than my original. Everything in your paintover is exactly the mood I was going for. I will take everything into consideration from both you and Saraiza and take another crack at it.
Thanks Flo
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#5
Very cool idea and I like everyone's suggestions, but I have to add one more thing: His head is tilted to the ground - looks like he's looking at his feet. His head and the eye slits should be turned towards the viewer, if that's what the guy is reaching for. If thay aren't, it's really hard to read what he's up to.
That's all I got =)

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#6
The slits were actually vents for his mouth, but I think adding eyes somehow would really help.
thanks
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