10-26-2012, 03:38 AM
I feel like I've seen this kind of post many times on many different creative forums, and have talked about it at length so maybe this will be helpful, probably not; but here are my thoughts on the topic of enjoying creativity. (Please note that these are my thoughts and I am probably wrong …and fat)
For years I was convinced I loved writing, mostly because I really enjoyed being creative and making up worlds and characters. In my mind this enjoyment of creating equaled enjoying being an author. I was so wrapped up in it that I saw no other way to be creative except writing. I never considered doing art or animation or sculpture or maybe recording a podcast. In my mind I loved coming up with fucked-up monsters so I had to write a story about monsters. There was simply no other way.
So I worked at it for years, improving my English, studying books, grinding through writing exercises until eventually I became a published author, making an okay second income writing non-fiction and short stories. I had gotten my foot in the door, had contacts in the publishing world and only had to keep pushing for a little while to eventually become a full-time author/ editor.
And then I realized I hated writing.
I would dread the deadlines, rush through my assignments, drop into cliche story tropes and just generally feel miserable. Even worse I realized I felt like this from the get go, I always hated sitting down in front of Word and typing away. I always hated the endless revisions and fuck grammar, just fuck it.
I had assumed that my feelings were there because I wasn't a professional or good enough to convey exactly what I saw in my mind. Once I was a full-time writer I would be so fucking happy to be writing, right? Once I would hit the level of "professional" writer crafting great stories would be a cake-walk, I just had to power through and get there. But here's the catch, it didn't get better. I guess in my mind I was going to grind away, level up and bam! all of a sudden I would become Stephen King.
This is something I see all the time on art forums. People go through the motions of studying, they hate it, hate every second of it, but keep doing it because they expect that at some point Bam! Level up and you become Frank Frazetta.
It doesn't work that way. You have to actually enjoy what you are doing as you are doing it. Sure at the end you might be angry that the story or the picture you made is bad, you might be frustrated that your brush strokes don’t look how you imagined them, but there is a difference between being frustrated and actually hating the whole process.
If you’re frustrated with your skills you’ll willingly push to get better, you’ll be learning and growing. If you hate the process, you’ll just make yourself miserable. You can still love being creative and still love coming up with worlds and creatures, but maybe you’re just not into expressing it through painting.
It’s hard to accept this when you’ve worked at something for years, it’s hard to consider walking away, but the truth is that if you don’t enjoy drawing on a consistent basis. You hate it today and you hate it a month from now, maybe trying to go into a field where you would be drawing for at least 8-9 hours every day is not a good idea. People confuse a love for creating with a love for art, but the two are not the same. (Just as my love of fucked up penis monsters wasn’t the same as being a writer for the entertainment section of AOL…man were they not the same.)
Do you enjoy trying to push yourself when studying or do you regularly go ”meh, that’s good enough” ?
Do you get excited when you find out something new about a layer effect or color combination and can’t wait to try it out?
Do you read or see stuff and think: “man this would be awesome in a painting, wow, if I could catch this texture it would be so bad-ass”?
Do you enjoy anything about art or do you grind through it because you hope to be able to use it as a tool to convey your creative ideas? Maybe there are better tools out there.
If you didn’t have the option of showing your work and getting instant praise from a community and views and comments and thumbs up would you still do it?
Finally, if you didn’t think of yourself as an artist, but just a dude, what would you be doing in your spare time? People label themselves as this or that and feel bad when they don’t fit the label. Don’t do that. Try to do what you enjoy.
Man… this is a fucking long post filled with crap. I guess I didn’t get the writer completely out of me. But here is a final thought. You will die. No matter what, you will die. So will you spend your life trying to be something you don’t enjoy or will you actually do stuff that you find fun?
For years I was convinced I loved writing, mostly because I really enjoyed being creative and making up worlds and characters. In my mind this enjoyment of creating equaled enjoying being an author. I was so wrapped up in it that I saw no other way to be creative except writing. I never considered doing art or animation or sculpture or maybe recording a podcast. In my mind I loved coming up with fucked-up monsters so I had to write a story about monsters. There was simply no other way.
So I worked at it for years, improving my English, studying books, grinding through writing exercises until eventually I became a published author, making an okay second income writing non-fiction and short stories. I had gotten my foot in the door, had contacts in the publishing world and only had to keep pushing for a little while to eventually become a full-time author/ editor.
And then I realized I hated writing.
I would dread the deadlines, rush through my assignments, drop into cliche story tropes and just generally feel miserable. Even worse I realized I felt like this from the get go, I always hated sitting down in front of Word and typing away. I always hated the endless revisions and fuck grammar, just fuck it.
I had assumed that my feelings were there because I wasn't a professional or good enough to convey exactly what I saw in my mind. Once I was a full-time writer I would be so fucking happy to be writing, right? Once I would hit the level of "professional" writer crafting great stories would be a cake-walk, I just had to power through and get there. But here's the catch, it didn't get better. I guess in my mind I was going to grind away, level up and bam! all of a sudden I would become Stephen King.
This is something I see all the time on art forums. People go through the motions of studying, they hate it, hate every second of it, but keep doing it because they expect that at some point Bam! Level up and you become Frank Frazetta.
It doesn't work that way. You have to actually enjoy what you are doing as you are doing it. Sure at the end you might be angry that the story or the picture you made is bad, you might be frustrated that your brush strokes don’t look how you imagined them, but there is a difference between being frustrated and actually hating the whole process.
If you’re frustrated with your skills you’ll willingly push to get better, you’ll be learning and growing. If you hate the process, you’ll just make yourself miserable. You can still love being creative and still love coming up with worlds and creatures, but maybe you’re just not into expressing it through painting.
It’s hard to accept this when you’ve worked at something for years, it’s hard to consider walking away, but the truth is that if you don’t enjoy drawing on a consistent basis. You hate it today and you hate it a month from now, maybe trying to go into a field where you would be drawing for at least 8-9 hours every day is not a good idea. People confuse a love for creating with a love for art, but the two are not the same. (Just as my love of fucked up penis monsters wasn’t the same as being a writer for the entertainment section of AOL…man were they not the same.)
Do you enjoy trying to push yourself when studying or do you regularly go ”meh, that’s good enough” ?
Do you get excited when you find out something new about a layer effect or color combination and can’t wait to try it out?
Do you read or see stuff and think: “man this would be awesome in a painting, wow, if I could catch this texture it would be so bad-ass”?
Do you enjoy anything about art or do you grind through it because you hope to be able to use it as a tool to convey your creative ideas? Maybe there are better tools out there.
If you didn’t have the option of showing your work and getting instant praise from a community and views and comments and thumbs up would you still do it?
Finally, if you didn’t think of yourself as an artist, but just a dude, what would you be doing in your spare time? People label themselves as this or that and feel bad when they don’t fit the label. Don’t do that. Try to do what you enjoy.
Man… this is a fucking long post filled with crap. I guess I didn’t get the writer completely out of me. But here is a final thought. You will die. No matter what, you will die. So will you spend your life trying to be something you don’t enjoy or will you actually do stuff that you find fun?