Lost Patience

[Comicsink]

Earlier tonight I was showing my previous deviantart drawings to my sister, and as I looked through them, I realized that some of the ones I did years ago were way better (quality wise) than some of the ones I'm doing now. Those drawings were in colored pencil! And I was just beginning to crack color theory with them. Do you know how much patience it requires to use those little bastards?! A LOT.

Then I look at the work I'm doing now and I wonder, what the hell happened here?!
Almost all of it's in black and white. I just dash off something on a piece of paper and call it a day. It feels like I lost a lot of the patience and soul that goes into making a quality piece and I was wondering if anyone could tell me how to get that back.

This is my best piece from just 2 years ago. I think it took a week or two, and required all I knew about composition, perspective and color theory at the same time. It was painstaking work, but result was WAY worth it.


This is one of my favorites from now:


I don't feel like this piece is that bad but it didn't take a lot of patience only took a day and I feel that if I put a lot more effort into it, that picture could easily outshine the top one, but that's just my opinion. What can I do to increase my patience when drawing drawing. Because now it seems I just whip something up as fast as I can just to get the kudos and attention. Whereas before, it was about the same thing, but at least I was testing my own limits and having fun seeing the results. There was a lot more...sincerity and effort to back it up. Do any of feel the same way, how can I change this?

[Chris P]

You are not alone, Comicsink. Unfortunately, there are no magic tricks or shortcuts here. It seems you already identified what you should be doing. There is no substitute for discipline.

One thought that might be helpful to keep in mind: Spending a lot of time on a picture is not a desirable goal in itself. The goal is to to the best work you can and to push your limits. Taking more time is just a side effect of that. In a way you already said it yourself ("... but at least I was testing my own limits and having fun seeing the results"). Trying to do that again might turn out to be more fruitful than trying to be more patient.

[Comicsink]

Oh, I think I see what you're saying: The amount of time it takes me is a result of pushing my limits right? That's a great way to think about it! I do a lot of self-analysis before I ask any questions, but it definitely helps to have someone else's input :) Thanks for replying!

[Amit Dutta]

Hiya it can be a hard thing to look back and see you have lost your way a bit, but this is good. The first step to a better balance and change is awareness. You seem to be becoming aware that the motivations for you have changed. You have moved your focus from "fun" to "getting kudos". From 'careful craft' to 'speed'.

Often I believe it is exposure to the wider online community, especially things like facebook groups that promote this type of behaviour shift: we want to get likes, views, comments, to feed our ego as our reward, rather than the reward to be gained from enjoying the process rather than the outcome. This negative aspect to online community can override our initial motivations in doing the work so be aware of it and DON'T LET IT.

If I was to suggest a few things to you to try:

1. Don't start to overthink why you are doing a piece. Do what you enjoy first and foremost, not what you think others will enjoy .
2. Don't post it online.

Yeah I mean #2! Not forever, or with everything but just hold back from that false reward of getting "likes" until you get back to the fundamentals of why you enjoy what you do artistically. After a while of doing this, you will realise how addicted to that reward you have become. It isn't healthy in my opinion, so I would stop posting on facebook, dA or anywhere where there is a reward system to your posting until you can do so without caring about who or how many like it. Posting here in CD in your SB is probably fine, because it is a smaller audience and we don't rub each other's egos as much as those other sites tend to allow.

In terms of time and patience, well these are just a factor of what you are doing and your motivations behind it. I wouldn't pay too much attention to how long or short anything takes you. It takes what it takes, as long as you are fulfilling your own internal needs for expression with the piece, what difference does it make how long it took?

[Comicsink]

Hiya it can be a hard thing to look back and see you have lost your way a bit, but this is good. The first step to a better balance and change is awareness. You seem to be becoming aware that the motivations for you have changed. You have moved your focus from "fun" to "getting kudos". From 'careful craft' to 'speed'.

Often I believe it is exposure to the wider online community, especially things like facebook groups that promote this type of behaviour shift: we want to get likes, views, comments, to feed our ego as our reward, rather than the reward to be gained from enjoying the process rather than the outcome. This negative aspect to online community can override our initial motivations in doing the work so be aware of it and DON'T LET IT.

If I was to suggest a few things to you to try:

1. Don't start to overthink why you are doing a piece. Do what you enjoy first and foremost, not what you think others will enjoy .
2. Don't post it online.

Yeah I mean #2! Not forever, or with everything but just hold back from that false reward of getting "likes" until you get back to the fundamentals of why you enjoy what you do artistically. After a while of doing this, you will realise how addicted to that reward you have become. It isn't healthy in my opinion, so I would stop posting on facebook, dA or anywhere where there is a reward system to your posting until you can do so without caring about who or how many like it. Posting here in CD in your SB is probably fine, because it is a smaller audience and we don't rub each other's egos as much as those other sites tend to allow.

In terms of time and patience, well these are just a factor of what you are doing and your motivations behind it. I wouldn't pay too much attention to how long or short anything takes you. It takes what it takes, as long as you are fulfilling your own internal needs for expression with the piece, what difference does it make how long it took?

This is wonderful advice! When I read "2. Don't post it online" I thought, "really?!" But your reasoning makes so much sense. Another reason why I want to get so much attention is because I want to build an online presence so that I can start to gain and audience for my better work. This is because I want to build a scholarship-grabbing portfolio by April, and the pressure (from my family) is immense. It's been a long time since I just relaxed and had fun with a piece instead of frantically scrawling something on a piece of copy paper. This post really helped. Thank you!

[Amit Dutta]

Great glad it helped.
You know nobody needs to see your folio pieces (unless you are getting feedback) except for the scholarship boards if that is what you need it for. Having an online presence won't help with that.

Definitely build an online presence to get your work out there for sure at some point, but remember it isn't really a priority for you at the moment if all you are doing is submitting for schools.

About the external pressure, yeah I feel that man. It is so hard to work creatively and authentically when somebody or some situation is creating pressure on you to do so. I don't have a lot of suggestions how, but I highly recommend you try and minimise any such pressure on yourself. Definitely work quickly if you need, but also allow yourself the breathing space to spend time with and have fun with each piece. If you are having fun, you are probably on the right track. The moment you stop enjoying it or are really stressing and struggling to push through, ask yourself why you are grinding and try and get back to the fun bit of the work. Your best work will come from enjoyment, not grinding. Work on what you want, not what others want.

Also rushing stressed through 20 pieces will end up with 20 rushed stressed pieces that show you aren't that considered with your craft. Coasting through and enjoying 12 pieces will end up with 12 laid back considered and finished pieces. Basically the time factor is important but sometimes you have to give a piece the time it needs. Always go away and do something else for a day or two if you end up feeling too manic. Just to chill yourself out.

Good luck with the folio building!

[Comicsink]

Great glad it helped.
You know nobody needs to see your folio pieces (unless you are getting feedback) except for the scholarship boards if that is what you need it for. Having an online presence won't help with that.

Definitely build an online presence to get your work out there for sure at some point, but remember it isn't really a priority for you at the moment if all you are doing is submitting for schools.

About the external pressure, yeah I feel that man. It is so hard to work creatively and authentically when somebody or some situation is creating pressure on you to do so. I don't have a lot of suggestions how, but I highly recommend you try and minimise any such pressure on yourself. Definitely work quickly if you need, but also allow yourself the breathing space to spend time with and have fun with each piece. If you are having fun, you are probably on the right track. The moment you stop enjoying it or are really stressing and struggling to push through, ask yourself why you are grinding and try and get back to the fun bit of the work. Your best work will come from enjoyment, not grinding. Work on what you want, not what others want.

Also rushing stressed through 20 pieces will end up with 20 rushed stressed pieces that show you aren't that considered with your craft. Coasting through and enjoying 12 pieces will end up with 12 laid back considered and finished pieces. Basically the time factor is important but sometimes you have to give a piece the time it needs. Always go away and do something else for a day or two if you end up feeling too manic. Just to chill yourself out.

Good luck with the folio building!

You've been such a great help in just 2 posts! I could really feel it working when I was drawing my comic today. Really appreciate it :)

[Amit Dutta]

Brilliant! I'm glad it has been useful advice. Just saving the struggle of another artist even by a little bit is enough reward to keep trying to give advice. :)