Constructive Criticism Appreciated Part II (2nd painting)
#1
Hi y'all.

Decided I'd try to apply most of the criticism I received from my former post (http://crimsondaggers.com/forum/thread-8683.html) onto my next painting, so here it is. I'm grateful to anyone who's given me feedback and helped me make my next painting.

Next time I would probably attempt to draw a more dynamic pose with clothing that's wilder and a silhouette more dramatic and also refine my lighting, but I realize that comes with practice. So far I'm happy with the progress I've made from my former picture :)

Meet Orion Alistaire (Ori)!

[Image: OCUZSKk.jpg]
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#2
Like someone on this forum told me adding the little detail that make thing functional can come a long way to help sell that even if it fantasy it base on reality.For example on those boot you could have added the string.There also something that personally catch my attention it that line on her chin that totally unnecessary in my opinion.I also think you could learn a few thing on composition your background element are to uniformly space out and it make it look stage and unatural.There an unspoken rule i think people should follow and it to not hide any of the limb they help sell 3d space.The foreshortening like you did in such extreme way to me is what i would refer to a ''newbie cheat'' creating a force sense of foreshortening without putting actually effort.Just like hiding limb it a way to shorten the time spend on a drawing that in my opinion you should avoid not only does it make you look amateurish to other artist it make you rely on such cheap trick.If i was you i would try to show more of the limb so as to not confuse the viewer and believe me it help sell movement and realism.

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#3
(08-19-2019, 12:55 AM)darktiste Wrote: Like someone on this forum told me adding the little detail that make thing functional can come a long way to help sell that even if it fantasy it base on reality.For example on those boot you could have added the string.There also something that personally catch my attention it that line on her chin that totally unnecessary in my opinion.I also think you could learn a few thing on composition your background element are to uniformly space out and it make it look stage and unatural.There an unspoken rule i think people should follow and it to not hide any of the limb they help sell 3d space.The foreshortening like you did in such extreme way to me is what i would refer to a ''newbie cheat'' creating a force sense of foreshortening without putting actually effort.Just like hiding limb it a way to shorten the time spend on a drawing that in my opinion you should avoid not only does it make you look amateurish to other artist it make you rely on such cheap trick.If i was you i would try to show more of the limb so as to not confuse the viewer and believe me it help sell movement and realism.

Thanks for the feedback. 
The string idea is great and to be honest...I totally forgot about that arm. I had it roughly sketched initially but when I went into lineart it got erased, in time, and it never came to memory again because even without it I kinda bought the pose. It's a dumb mistake, I know. But yes, it would be better if it were visible :)

And I tried disabling the chin line but without it, due to the lighting sources, she kinda just looked like a worm from afar, so I kind of preferred this version. But I'd also be wary of facial lineart next time, if I draw something more realistic.
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#4
@NarkissArt Hey, very nice progress from your previous post, the pose and perspective are much better.

In my opinion, the lighting could be more clearly defined . you could make a hard light and you lit hard the part that are hit by the sun, or you could make it very diffuse with a greyish sky, for example, but either way the part that face the ground are gonna be way darker than the part that don't. My suggestion would be to use a reference of a lighting situation, either a photo or a concept art for your next one. I think this one is fine as it is, but I suggest you study a lighting situation from a photograph, or a concept, and try apply it to your next work.

@Darktiste Hello , I dunno for the perspective exageration, its a matter of taste I think, but I disagree with the comment on the limb hidden, in some pose you have some limb hidden, and it has been done quite a few time in illustration. I actually think it can sell the drawing and 3D when its done accuratly . An example of frazetta here, where an arm and a leg are hidden, and it's a great drawing imo.


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#5
Hey! Agree with the comments on the frazetta piece and what you can learn from it. Integral is also composition. Even though what you have is more of an illustrative pin-up of a character's design, a strong grasp of composition will sell it better. Its like packaging for a product, supportive in nature for work like this. 

Did a brief paintover/edit with that in mind. Only change to the character is moving the cape. In your piece, the cape, knees, and blade all end on the same curve, added to the cape to break it up and give a stronger gesture. Also took out the trees and lightened the bg. Trees could defintely have a place here, but they were dark enough to affect the silhouette. If you do decide to have trees in the work, design them in. Everything in the work is under your pen, control and design it! :)

(also moved the canvas to place her in a more comfortable 3rd)

[img][Image: kkFX9QJ.jpg][/img]
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