Patience?

[Tan-Sau]

Okay, so here's what's happening: I've been drawing anime characters since I was in the sixth grade, and recently, I've been finding myself rushing to improve my drawing skills. I often plan these practice schedules with unrealistic expectations and end up scrapping them because I'm not sure if what I'm doing is right or not (I even bought a calendar for that exact reason). And as for my character drawings, I can't even stand to look at them because they look the same; there has been no change since I was in high school. My drawings still look like the stuff you'd find on deviantART. Don't get me wrong, I'm starting to like drawing from life, but (at the risk of sounding like a spoiled kid) real life bores me. What I really want to do is draw cartoons, and I know I have to study from life, but the idea of it taking a long time to reach the level I want kinda adds to the frustration. I'm not really sure if what to even ask here, so here are my questions:

1. How can I enjoy drawing from imagination knowing my art's not very good?

2. Is there any way of becoming more patient?

I'm sorry if I come off as some whiner, but I'm tired of this repeating itself, and I really want to improve.

[Amit Dutta]

Heya there is a very similar thread and question posted here which I replied to and helped the poster
http://crimsondaggers.com/forum/showthread.php?tid=5939

Have a read through it and post back in here if it didn't help or leave questions in your mind still.

To answer your questions briefly though

1. Dispell the idea from your mind that enjoying doing art is linked to it being "good" or not. It isn't. We somehow seem to have learned this parrotted idea that external appreciation of anything we do is the only way to ascribe value to it, and it's just utter bullshit. If you enjoy the feeling of pen or paint on paper or just doodling away or creating worlds, then focus on that. Ignore everyone else. Eventually you will get better and get compliments, but these are just as meaningful as the people telling you your stuff is crap.

2. Patience comes from acceptance of your status. The more you fight and try to force things at speed the less patient you will be. Instead accept that it will take a while to get where you want, but in the meantime bloody enjoy what you do now. What's the point in waiting for some unknown point in the future when it all comes together for you?...actually it will never happen in the way you imagine, so just get in touch with what you enjoy about the process first, and try not to think too much about the outcomes.

Just work hard, enjoy what you do, listen to your own true instincts and the rest will take care of itself in time.

[Jeanneillustrates]

I am fighting with this too. For an extremely long time I hated everything I did. I tried to do things a million different ways and I have shed an ocean of tears over it and then I finally realized what was wrong.

I was focused on an outcome, not the work itself. I have a tendency to look at other people's work too often and then I become too self conscious of what I am doing and my perfectionism spirals out of control.

I have been reading a lot of books with mindfulness as the central theme and it is helping. Once I sat down and was completely present with the image I was trying to make, not thinking about what else I could be doing, or what it would look like, etc, and simply trying to enjoy each part of what I did I breathed a little easier. Now, this doesn't happen every single time. I get so anxious when I am working- especially as more days pass (I'm 26 and I feel like my opportunities are just skipping right past me) that this is a hard thing to accomplish. I struggle with discipline and doing "false work" which I consider work that is not the real act of drawing or painting. I spend more time "researching" than I do drawing a lot of the time and I know it comes down to fear.

Here is what I have learned so far in my struggle that I hope will help you.

1. This is in no way easy. It seems like it should be, but because we are ambitious about our drawings it will always be a struggle.

2. You have to learn how to accept the uncertainty and the uncomfortable feeling of time pressing in on you and start to face your fears and anxieties head on.

3. do the hardest part first, first thing in the morning. Your energy and willpower depletes throughout the day and the sooner you can get to work on a drawing, the better.

4. Small efforts add up. Do a little of the practice you don't want to do each day and get it out of the way and then the rest of the time, go ahead and play and find what it is that you want to say in your art

5. If real life bores you, you aren't looking closely enough. Spend more time outside observing. Look at the colors and shadows and shapes and patterns. It will take a while to see, but once you start paying attention things will begin to look too gorgeous for words and then you will feel horrible because you can't capture the beauty. Personally, I love drawing from life because I feel like I am experiencing it better and it is meditative and takes some of the stress out of being creative and innovative.

I am having a hard time sticking to my schedules too. Part of it is that I haven't figured out the best way to juggle all of my responsibilities and still get it done, part of it is trying to deal with my energy levels and part of it is something I don't understand yet. I bet it is tied to fear.

If you want a boost, listen to https://www.youtube.com/user/JamesVictore these videos. They will make you feel so much better. Good luck to us both!

[Amit Dutta]

+1 to mindfulness in life, and not just in art. Jeanne is right. Meditation is a great practice to get into as well, I can attest to that.

Alan Watts, Jiddu Krishnamurty, even Eckhart Tolle are all to be found on YouTube and are a good westerner's intro to Eastern philosophy, mindfullness and zen practice.

Why they don't teach this stuff in all schools just boggles my mind.

We don't really get it as a species yet, do we? Even though much of this wisdom of old has been there for millennia. But no, consumerism, money, beauty and youth, external success, and all the shallow things that don't mean a damn are promoted as the way to a good life. *sighs

[Jeanneillustrates]

Thanks for the meditation links! I want to start doing it, but like everything: where do you start?

And Amit, you are totally correct about life. I wish things could slow down a little, or we can have the important things structured into life from a young age. It's weird how we don't realize the important stuff until age starts to become noticeable and then a person becomes frantic trying to "catch up."

One day, once I've mastered my skills and I feel comfortable teaching, I want to create a mentorship/apprenticeship program and one of the "classes" would be something about how to prepare for life as an artist mentally- to include meditation and exercise and grounding and lessons about habits and discipline so on because if I had known the things I'm learning now earlier, I feel like I would be farther along on this part of my journey.

[Amit Dutta]

Well those names I mentioned are more about the philosophy of mindfullness, zen, buddhism, authentic living etc. One I forgot to mention who isn't really focused on these, but definitely has adopted their world view and is amazing, is Joseph Campbell. There is the 'power of myth' which was an interview series with Bill Moyers and 'the hero's journey' which are both amazing and really blew me away: how human mythologies and cultural identities shape our understanding of the nature of life. The Youtube playlist I watched unfortunately doesn't seem to be around anymore, but hunt around and I'm sure you will find something. Go for the longer videos I guess. I highly recommend his talks!


All have different approaches but the general message is very similar: In other words how to see past the conditioned crap that we are all subjected to and take for granted/don't question because that is the way of modern non spiritual mainstream teaching.

In terms of meditation I would recommend finding the nearest Buddhist Shambhala centre to where you live and going to a free introductory meditation session that they all should run quite regularly. That is where I started. All you need really is a few "techniques" to get started and then a bit of dedication in getting it into your daily approach. After you see the benefits (almost immediately) it is just a matter of maintaining.

I too am very keen on teaching/mentoring and hope to go that path as well. There a ton of pros nowadays teaching technique but I haven't heard any of them look at it as a holistic general approach to life as well which in my opinion is almost more important especially for new starters who are very self critical, fearful and stressed. It is an admirable goal that you wish to do that as well. Don't worry about how far along you are compared to others or even for yourself. It takes as long as it takes, but I think finding a balanced approach is more important to save the anguish and grind that comes along with the territory. :)

[Adam Lina]

Tan, you can draw from life but stylize what you see. It doesnt have to be an exact copy. Change real life to look the way you want it to look and make it better. And I agree with Amit and Jeanne about using mindfulness to increase patience. Time is an illusion after all. The past is only a memory and the future can only be imagined. The present moment is all there ever is or will be. The only way to contentment is to make peace with the present. Dwelling on the past or pondering endlessly about the future will always leave you unfulfilled.

Of course you can still make plans for goals you want to reach but imagining yourself in the future and worrying about the endless things that might go wrong is wasted energy. The same with asking yourself endlessly "what if I had done things different in the past". You can simply reflect back on a past mistake and make a note of useful lessons you may have learned and then come back to the present. Most of us spend all day thinking about the past and future. But the world around us can only be experienced and fully appreciated in our present state. So dont just think about what Im saying. Try to apply it because it can only be experienced. Thinking will just get in the way and take you out of the present.

[Jeanneillustrates]

Amit, I love Joseph Campbell! I'm steadily working my way through his books at the library. I need my own copies though so I can make notes in them. :D

Adam, about the present/future thing, that is a great point. I'm constantly thinking back to what I would have done different if I just could school wise, etc, but I'm trying to stop that and just focus on the day ahead but man, no one gives you any hints on how to maintain focus for long. I feel like my energy is depleted so quickly!

[Minksy]

I think both Jeanne and Amit made some really good points in their replies to your thread.

What I'd say is maybe not that new, but here it goes anyway:

The first step to improvement is realizing that there is something that could be done better. If you see that your imaginative work gets repetitive, that's where studies come in. In order to produce something different every time, you need to have built a strong visual library to draw from. This has always been my weakest point in everything drawing-wise, and it took a really long time to understand where the problem was. And the more you see things don't work out, the more you want to get there fast.. but: it. takes. time. So try remind yourself of that, if you need to, stick notes around your work-space to remind you of that.

And do more studies.. from life, from photos, from masters, just do a lot of them by trying to really understand how the composition works, why it works, the color, the light everything. If it helps, dedicate study sessions to specific topics so you don't get overwhelmed. But try to really understand how things work, without copying mindlessly. If you do, I'm sure you will start catching yourself looking at the most boring every day objects in your house and just thinking to yourself how desaturated that color is, or how the shadow starts at a certain point. Or that the form could be carved out of a box at this or that point. And that's when suddenly every day life stops to be boring. It gains your attention, because it's worth studying and applying what you've learned so far, and urges you to explore the form visually.

If you lack motivation and look for some more advice on how to be patient.. I definitely recommend Anthony Jones' videos "Hot to study" and "Shortcut to become an amazing artist" . It's irrelevant what end-style you aim for.. the preparation for any style goes through fundamentals, so practicing getting better at that first, will slowly build up your skillset for anything else you wish to pursue art-wise. :o) Hope this helps even a little bit.

[Tan-Sau]

Thanks for the advice, everyone. Although, I kinda realized most of this a couple of days ago, as well as some new drawing habits. I feel a lot better now, but it's only a matter of time before I get frustrated again. And to be honest, I'm kinda anticipating that, because the first time I got frustrated with my anime drawings was when I grew tired of my lines. So I learned how to draw from my elbow, and after a couple of months of practice, I was able to draw using clean strokes instead of chicken scratches. During this period, I began drawing from life. A year later, I felt like I was still... stiff, so I learned how to draw loosely using gestural lines, and I began drawing large masses (is that the correct term?) or shapes and broke them down into smaller shapes that would create objects. Problem was, I'm just starting to apply these to my anime-like drawings. And even though I have very little fundamental knowledge or ideas, I'm really enjoying drawing these random characters. So now, I'm left wondering, "What's next?" I'm itching to dive into anatomy, but since I can draw people from life and be satisfied the results, I don't really think just drawing from life will give me the answers to what I want to improve on next, since almost every life study I do comes out looking good in my eyes. And on the other hand, I'm not sure if finding the answers on what to study through drawing from imagination is a good idea (I've read that it's not).

[Amit Dutta]

So if you've realised all the advice given in the thread, and yet you know it is only a matter of time before you get frustrated, then you haven't really "got" the message.
We will all go through frustration to some degree and often that is an indication that you need to practice more or do something completely different.

You say you are satisfied with your life drawing skills but you want to dive into anatomy? You need to have a fair amount of anatomy understanding to do life drawing really well in my opinion. If you aren't seeing anything to improve on, then perhaps you need other people to critique your work.

In fact why not put post a few examples of your work here instead of going just on your own evaluations, and I'm sure we can help you out with where to improve next.

It sounds more like you don't know what or how to study "properly" and all I can say to that is, do whatever feels right for you. There is no absolute correct way to study besides maybe as a general rule, focusing on fundamentals first and then applying that to your imagination work. Rinse. Repeat. But again it depends on your goal? If cartooning is what you want to do, then for sure you probably don't need to do thousands of hours of life drawing. You still need to be able to instill life in your characters and their actions, but you probably don't need to know the name of all the muscles and where they attach; it certainly wouldn't hurt, and it would mean you become more versatile, but technically not needed in the same way a realist illustrator would need to study that stuff.

Perhaps you would benefit from some online or real courses where you are lead through a set process rather than having to set something up for yourself. It is always a learning and valuable experience to be forced into a particular workflow for a while.

I had a look at your sketchbook and you seem to have some nice basic gestures and proportions and figure construction down for sure, but that's as far as the stuff posted there goes. You rarely seem to take anything further to a finished state (or at least don't post it) The anime characters seem fine enough as well, but again never taken very far past sketches. If you feel you have skills enough in a certain area, then the question starts to become "why?". What are you going to do with it, what do you want to say with it? This is actually more important than just being able to technically draw something correctly or make it look pretty.

You have amassed some skill behind you which could definitely be improved on, but I think you need to just give yourself a break, have a listen to what you want to do and don't stress out so much about whether it is the right or wrong thing or how quickly you are improving.
Just knowing something from an intellectual level, isn't the same as living and being it.

[Gliger]

Are you still happy with your drawings from life?

[Amit Dutta]

lol Gliger. Fowkes is good enough to instill feelings of inadequacy in almost any artist. haha