Doolio's doodles

[AngeliquevdMee]

I havent done EMG yet, it freaks me out hahaha maybe i should though :) now.. go get some rest! ;) you have been typing a lot again haha good luck!

[Ursula Dorada]

Oh whoa, this is some hard news Doolio. Take it easy, one step at the time. Take care of yourself and rest :) Hope it all turns out for the best. Excellent updates though!

[Lyraina]

Oh man, that's tough Doolio D:
I hope you'll find some way to treat this, be it through flexing, massaging, cooling or whatever.
Lovely update though, all those hands and feet! Woah! O_O
In the mean time, maybe play a bit with different tools like pen tool and gradients? Could lead to interesting results while straining your hand less.

Stay strong *hug*

[Amit Dutta]

It's a tough challenge man. I would say I'm sorry to hear it, but if you are really into zen or buddhism or the nondual type of thing then you know well that any external phenomena aren't done to us or sent to test us and actually all the suffering we experience is largely self-inflicted (i don't mean physical suffering of course, but how we respond as a result).
Have you thought about trying out alternative treatments like accupuncture? I know there isn't a lot of conclusive research out there except for joint pain, but it might be worth a try. You know we assume that doctors know everything because they are in positions of authority and use science, but in all honesty they are just scratching the surface even for simple conditions and are symptom-cause hunters more than anything else. You realise this when you see the fumbling and lack of knowledge that goes on first hand with treatment.
Anyways good luck with your condition and I hope you find a good balance. Every challenge also affords new opportunity even though it may seem hidden. :)

[Doolio]

Thanks guys:)

monkeybread - indeed:)

about the "zen" - well, I am into it, but I must disclaim here that I use the term as a slang term in a much broader sense, so it pretty much encompasses everything which has to do with well being and psychological and spiritual calmness - from jung and campbell, carl rogers or berne, conventional psychology, through new age chit chat, awareness, mindfulness, present moment, non-worry etc. all to zen, dao and all that stuff:) I mean, it basically comes to a single practice/theory when you compare all of that to each other. So, basically, when I say "zen", I mean an emotionally stable, fully mature "heroe's journey" kinda guy:)

And, as it usually goes, my "zen theory" is pretty strong (being extremely and actively interested in psychology and philosophy for about more than half of my life), but my practice is lacking:)

Which brings me to your point about challenge and opportunity. Having found out that I am anxious with extremely "jumpy nervous system", and at the same time having found out that I have slight cholesterol and liver problems actually did good for me, as my immature mind seemed to interpreted it as the official black on white that I have to actually turn my lifestyle upside down, both physically and mentally/spiritually/psychologically. Fortunately, I do know some stuff, so only that's left is the actual application, which is being put into effect for a couple of months already, steady as she goes:)

So, actually, yes, in that sense, it is fortunate I've got my blood tested (for entirely different reasons) and went to the doctor in the first place.


But, as I'm far from being full zen master, this hand thing does get to me:) So, in a non-zen techincal "rl" world the situation is annoying, to say the least:) Not to mention the doctors' vanity, deafness to what the patient is saying etc. I think that the rigidity they've been taught hurts the medical practice the most. Now, I understand the reasoning behind it - go by the book and there would probably be less errors. But, it borders on stupidity almost all the time. if you have the human factor - use it. for example, my old man had a heart attack and prior to that he had some chest pains and pulse fluctuations. so he went to the cardiologist (a good one) and said something like "my pulse has been x and now is y", the doctor asked for how long, he responed "for two weeks" and the doctor immediately said "impossible". and that was that. and later he got heart attack:)

I thought about acupuncture, it's on my "list" along with magnetotherapy, other neurologists/physicians for a second opinion, chiropractic, raw food diet etc:) The problem is, the doctors convinced me that the tests are 100% infallible and that I have mildest of mildest neuropathy with no possibility for nerve entrapment or damage, so, just slight irritation in the nerve root in the neck. and it would "surely" go away after like five pt. and then i went to fifteen and it's still the same. and after that i had the neurologist (who is a relatively esteemed professor of neurology or something like that - i don't know what it's called in english, the dude above the dudes with just college, md perhaps?) swear to me that I do not have nerve issues regarding my hand.

And those stuff happen. there's no point in me going there and yell at the staff or something:D nor there is point in brooding over it (there's that zen:) ), but the, how should I put it, physical reality, is that I don't have the money right now to go see specialists or practitioners. the sureness of doctors and their instruments and their approach were like i came to them with something ten times less serious and complicated than, for example, runny nose. so i was like "ok, this is the standardest of standard things (which they did tell me in fact), lets get this over with, shut up and take my money". and it is a respectable clinic, might I add:)

So, acupuncture and everything else would have to wait. In the meantime, I am left with google and general bettering of my life and I'll see how it goes. I can buy smaller stuff that might work (splints or supplements etc) and can do stretches from youtube, regulate what I eat etc. and that's it for now. At least, the hand doesn't seem to get any worse. The downside of all that is that, of course, bunch of stuff, exercises and advice go against each other, which could be extremely dangerous, as I'm dealing with nerves and stuff, which are a bit touchy. On the other side, there's a lot of stuff everybody agrees upon.

And yes, after educating myself a bit about all that stuff, it really does seem that the whole area is poorly researched, sadly.

so i have to do the trial and error stuff, and to be more interesting, these types of things are slooooow, so even if i stumble upon something good, it would show after like three months. and the same goes for the bad stuff:)




angelique:
emg isn't that scary - well, it's not exactly pleasant, but i wouldn't have problem with taking it again, for example. some sets of shocks are indeed relatively strong (you feel the punch pretty good and your arm goes in the air and stuff, and there's like tens of those) and the needles are a bit unpleasant (but not more than any other needle), but everything else is literally nothing. by that i mean that the whole procedure might take for example half an hour, but the unpleasant part of it lasts like five minutes. and it's not that unpleasant, it's just "weirdly unpleasant".


ursula:
will do and thank you:D


lyraina:
hug back:D

i don't know. i'm taking it slowly. i'll see can i go with these 30-90 mins a day croquis-ish stuff and try to gradually do more. i mean, tricky part is that changes are slow in either direction, so i have to test things for like twenty days before even having the slightest chance at assessing the results. the other part of trickiness is that i can actually do pretty much everything (well, not literally, but yeah) if i go through the pain. i mean, i could sit right now and draw viciously with inhuman pressure sensitivity setting for ten hours, i can do it mechanically. i don't think that's a good idea though:D
so i have to make micro decisions all the time, how much pain is "pain" and how much pain is beneficial workout etc.



ok, this was another scribbomaniacal outburst, but this one was a bit more deliberate, to see how i'll wake up tomorrow. not the brightest test, but well, i'm not the brightest person:DDD

[Amit Dutta]

True enough mate, many of the nondual spiritual masters and zen teachers and now even quantum physicists say very much the same message albeit through very, often radically, different frameworks, which makes me think they are onto something here. The phenomena based world of the conscious observer is really illusory over the true fundamental nature of "reality", and we as people in society are completely conditioned to be unaware of this.

Indeed there is a huge difference between knowing this intellectually and actually achieving this realisation with your entire being; this seems to be much harder to "do". In fact most of the non doctrinal versions of this say that it is not a "doing" practice or an intellectual movement that will get you to your own self realisation, it is simply being meditative without proscription, and that is not something where x hours meditation = x level towards self realisation. So you don't have to put a "plan" into effect, but I would say, definitely being meditative in daily life can only help. :) oh and eating better is definitely the way to go. I went light paleo, non grain and felt immediately better only a week in.

I myself am only about a half year into my own "practice" shall we say and I can say I have seen some changes in knowledge of myself and a shifting of perspectives coming through...a long long bloody way to go, but it's a worthwhile "endeavour" to explore the nature of oneself, that doesnt necessarily reside in the molecules and sinew and nerves that makes up your body, nor in the procedures, systems and patterns that currently make up human society. When it comes to art, well it has certainly changed my perspective too. All the study, all the jobs, all the stepped hierarchy of accolades and achievements, amount to nothing if you aren't doing what your own consciousness wants to express with it. It literally changes the game and turns it on its head.

In your YT travels look up jiddhu krishnamurti, alan watts and joseph campbell (i guess this is the campbell of whom you speak?) You've probably come across them all before, but I've been getting lots of resonance with their approaches. :) you don't have to respond with a long message, I know you have limited typing hand hour quotas. :)

[Doolio]

Monkeybread, I sent you a PM about the mojo stuff:)

As for updates, there's one coming soon. I managed to stabilize at one hour a day without disastrous consequences, which is a good start, I guess:)
I am still just doing croquis-ish lalala doodling and I think I'll have to restrain myself from going medieval on drawing for quite a bit of time:) but, I am currently very satisfied with one hour a day, as it's, well, more than zero:D
I am still on a doolio custom zero moneyz home regiment, maybe in a month I'll go to chiropractors, I've heard about a certaion duo that is actually good:D

[meat]

I hope your arm condition can be eventually healed. Unfortunately I don't have any useful tips or information that will help you... have you thought about trying acupuncture? Would you consider training your other hand to draw while your main arm rest? Then 1 year later you could be drawing 2 papers simultaneously with both hands, leaving the rest of us in green, envious dust of Ozland....

Your hand and feet studies are awesome, inspiring me to pick it up myself!

[Doolio]

Acupuncture is on a "if chiropractor fails and I get more money" list:D

If you saw me doing anything with my left hand, you would write "400 years later", not "1 year later":D







an update

[EduardoGaray]

Super tasty stuff man, like i told you, i'm looking forward to see you recovered and kicking ass ten times faster haha.
I recognize some of the poses/characters you drew and i can tell you really nailed them.
Some may say that you shouldnt study people still alive but thats silly, as long as you are actually studying and not just copying like what i think you are doing. :D
Stay strong mate!

[meat]

Alright guys, if that's what Doolio's doing with an injured hand, we gotta pick up our games yo! Get busy!!!

[Doolio]

Super tasty stuff man, like i told you, i'm looking forward to see you recovered and kicking ass ten times faster haha.
I recognize some of the poses/characters you drew and i can tell you really nailed them.
Some may say that you shouldnt study people still alive but thats silly, as long as you are actually studying and not just copying like what i think you are doing. :D
Stay strong mate!

thanks, will do:)

I think the thing about studying only "the dead" is silly too:) I do try to use brain when doing these, to see curves, anatomy, stylization... that's specific stuff which could help me, so I think the actual anime illustrations are the way to go - in this case. I would/will turn to dead people for composition, technique etc.

we'll see how this "forced experiment" goes and if there will be any progress with studying without application for like a month or so.

Alright guys, if that's what Doolio's doing with an injured hand, we gotta pick up our games yo! Get busy!!!

ahahah, now I'll become clumsy and embarrassed little girl:D These are just sketches from references, if they were from imagination, they would look... different:D
Thanks for the comment it means a lot, especially as I'm in the "I forgot how to draw a stickman" phase.

[Triggerpigking]

Nice studies, it's impressive that you're still doing this amount of work with an injured hand.
Also I totally agree on the whole studying only from the dead thing, I get why people say it but I don't agree with it in the slightest, as you said as long as you're actually studying said artist know why you are studying them and not just copying then it's fine.
Hope you recover soon man so you can start kicking ass again full force! Good Luck! :D.

[Lyraina]

That discussion about studying from dead people up there sparked some interesting misinterpretations in my brain ... like ... a cheaper but possibly bad smelling replacement for (a)life drawing models ... :P But I don't think that was what you were talking about :P

I agree though, there are some very nice curves and lines in there. I should go back to Hampton as well...

Hope you're well!

[Eve]

I'm sorry to hear of your hand! But ohh manga studies! They are from pixiv I guess? I recognise the characters, but sadly none of the drawings or artist who made them... I really like the one in high angle perspective, and your anatomy stuff. Whenever I study drawings I tend to search for sketches, since that will also show the line quality and sometimes gives hints on how the person constructs his drawings. What helps with the stylization part is when you try to draw an original drawing in the style of the artist you just studied. That way it makes you really think of how to apply tricks your artist uses. At least this is how I tend to tackle these kind of studies ^^

@lyraina: that was my initial thought as well, lol.

[crackedskull]

Life has a habit of throwing shit at you, its unfair, but thats just how it is.
Whenever something shit happens to me I think back to that moment in Cowboy Bepop
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QjM6xbJglPY
You just accept it and move on...Also it helps to think that youre not in some third world country starving and avoiding death.

Hope the recovery goes good man, take your time with art because health is the most important thing.

[Doolio]

hi guys, sorry for the late reply, but you already got used to it for the time being, i hope:D
vis maior/casus fortuitus:(


trigger and lyraina:

thanks guys:)

yep, i'm trying to get something into my thick skull by doing quick studies from artists that have a certain style i'm interested in:) so, yeah, basically, dead people thing MAY be an argument for something else (like i said before, learning the fundamentals of composition or light etc, because old masters dug into that stuff like crazy), but i don't see why one shouldn't use "non-dead" artists to try and extract some more specific things from them. everything has its own purpose i guess:)


eve:
thanks:)
illustrations i've studied from are actually from everywhere lol:) i have a ~8yr folder or so (and running) with thousands of pics, anime, illsutration, concept art, classical art etc. so i have plenty of material if i want to study from an art piece specifically.
anime stuff comes mostly from random browsing and also from cghub (rip), minitokyo gallery (there are a lot of quality scans - useful if you want to, say, print a piece on a 3ft canvas or something) and others... i too don't know many of the artists i pull from, some i do know, though... i would suggest minitokyo for browsing and getting to know who's "that guy that does those square eyed loli maids" or whatever. sometimes they put the wrong tag, though.

ah yes, the actual application is the main goal of this "experiment":) we'll see how it goes:)
when i fix this damn hand, i plan to go medieval on application and doing pieces that actually demand more than ten minutes a piece:)

skull:

thanks man:) and yeah, accept and move on, which i'll do when i get the proper diagnosis and outcome prediction:D seriously though, that's a wise advice. though it's hard to follow for an immature whiny dude such as myself:D
i think that the duration of the "moment" being several months and the uncertainty are the main problem for me (aside from not being able to draw lol).



ok, an "update":) (my posts are like ten days apart... well, blah:) )



p.s.
don't mind my whining much, i'm just venting a bit, i'm not actually going around for the whole day whining, even though it seems like it:D
i mean,
"hey doolio, nice sketches"
"thanks dude, anyway, my hand hurts blahblahblah"
:)
try not to pay attention to that lol:)

[meat]

Who do I need to kill to be able to come up with this much drawings??

Also, have you see this artist? He now has a Pixiv and Tumblr, but he left out all his older works that showed where he came from. His original website still has some old works, but even there the oldest stuff were taken off, like the FFTactics fanart (thank gods I saved some). He basically started out doing nothing but MyHime and then FFTatics fanart in what looked like MSPaint, one per day, for a long while. Then he was doing sketches like what you did here on his train commute. Eventually he leveled up to full paintings with lighting and all. I really admire how he got from where he was to where he is, and really wish I could too, but I'm just not doing his amount of work and dedication....

Anyway, here is his original website. It's all jibberish but all those blue symbols are links to massive art dumps, especially the ones all the way at the bottom, so just click and browse: http://cpt.ninja-x.jp/

And here are his Pixiv and Tumblr, where he puts recent stuff. He seems to have stopped using the original website now: http://www.pixiv.net/bookmark.php?id=55126
http://ikedacpt.tumblr.com/

[Doolio]

Who do I need to kill to be able to come up with this much drawings??

Hahah, thanks dude:D But really, it's like a 15 days update, with bunch of loose sketches, ranging from 5 to 15 minutes each:) It's about hour - hour and a half a day, that's how much I can afford to draw...
And also, it's a matter of "you start to cherish something only when you lose it", so now I'm like "oh god, I want to draw 24/7":)
Don't worry though, when I fix my hand, it'll be procrastination all over the place again (hope not):D

I'll check the links, thanks (I browsed through them quickly). About dedication... well, I think it's just a matter of finding what drives you (I don't mean as in "art drives me", I mean something more specific). For me, for example, it's a simple thing of tiny awards - if you draw x hours, you're allowed to watch an episode of xyz:) It does require A BIT of discipline, but it's a gradual process, eventually you should develop the craving for drawing:) Similar to anything else, really, like when you start going to the gym, you're going to whine and try to skip days, but after several months you'll be like "oh shit, I've got pneumonia... must..train..." :) And vice versa, if you skip several days, you'll go back to not having the habit of going to the gym.

I haven't done much with this approach. I didn't draw mindlessly. Yet, I have regressed in drawing form imagination. Now I've decided to continue deconstructing Sadamoto, but with immediate application in the same "session".

[Samszym]

Awesome stuff Doolio!! Can't wait to see you keep developing